Introduction

Welcome back to Linking Our Libraries! This week we are going to talk about Interpersonal Skills as a tool that leaders use to get things done.

We are the Central Minnesota Libraries Exchange, and we are here to chat with you this season about building your leadership skills. We provide support and training for all types of libraries, and our work can be used by anyone who wants to build skills, and to become a better leader in your own organization.

Do you want to talk with us further about leadership skills? Do you need some training organized for your organization? We are here for you! Check out our website: cmle.org and let’s get this started!

And while you are here, we would love for you to join our community of leaders! Check out our Patreon, help support the show, and get some fun rewards. Official Office Dog, Lady Grey, thanks you for your support of good leadership!

And now, on with the show! Who is here this week? Joining us is Leah Larson, from the Minnesota State Library Services!

 

The Basics

You know those other people in your workplace? It would be great to develop better interpersonal skills to be able to work most effectively with them, to provide great service, and to help everyone on your team to be as successful as possible.  And what are those? We define this as effectively working together with others of different levels or different positions (staff and public); good social skills; and building rapport with others.

A startling number of people believe that working in a library or an archive means being able to sit in a basement, alone, and work individually. And too many library people are still stuck in the olden days of wanting to shush everyone, instead of looking for ways to say YES to good service. A lot of us are introverts, and may struggle with easy communication and socializing.

 

All of this is okay. (Well, not the shushing. That’s over.) This is an area where we can always improve, and it is always worth spending some time working on these skills. You do not need to become a social butterfly, or the life of every party. You just need to connect with others in a meaningful or useful way. Great leaders must be good at interpersonal skills; this applies no matter what your title is – you can lead from any position.

 

Here are a few tips you can try to show off your skills:

• Work on your communication skills. This applies to speaking and writing. If you are not being clear, or if you sound too brusque, or it seems like you are not listening to others – all of these are going to short-circuit your communication process. Check out our prior episode on this topic to build up some skills in this area.
• Be aware of nonverbal communication. Everyone is familiar with the person who declares they are fine, as they slam books on the counter in apparent annoyance. Paying attention to what people are saying with their faces and bodies will help facilitate communication, and being aware of the nonverbal communication you are sharing can help you to send the message you actually want to share.
• Build your emotional intelligence. For this, you need to do some inward looking to get a handle on your thoughts and feelings. Then you need to look around at the ways others are demonstrating their thoughts and feelings. Emotions are contagious, and being able to consciously control how you behave in response to your and other people’s emotions, can help you to react more effectively to situations.
• Handle conflict effectively. No one enjoys conflict, but building up skills to handle it in a way that promotes resolution is a great skill to learn! Remaining calm, removing emotions, and working toward a conclusion will all help. Check out our full episode on this topic for more ideas.
• Be aware of differences. Yes, everyone in a library or archive already has a lot in common. (We are all pretty awesome!) But it’s also good to be aware of difference people around you in terms of their race, gender, religion, socio-economic status, favorite color, pet status, and any other potential variable. It’s too easy to assume other people share your ideas and assumptions; focus on recognizing and respecting them to be sure you are strengthening the workplace with a diversity of skills and experiences.

Now we have some theories about improving our interpersonal skills. So let’s build on that and talk with Leah about how to really make that happen!

 

Books We Read

The Gentleman’s Guide to Vice and Virtue by Mackenzi Lee “Henry “Monty” Montague doesn’t care that his roguish passions are far from suitable for the gentleman he was born to be. But as Monty embarks on his grand tour of Europe, his quests for pleasure and vice are in danger of coming to an end. Not only does his father expect him to take over the family’s estate upon his return, but Monty is also nursing an impossible crush on his best friend and traveling companion, Percy.

So Monty vows to make this yearlong escapade one last hedonistic hurrah and flirt with Percy from Paris to Rome. But when one of Monty’s reckless decisions turns their trip abroad into a harrowing manhunt, it calls into question everything he knows, including his relationship with the boy he adores.

Witty, dazzling, and intriguing at every turn, The Gentleman’s Guide to Vice and Virtue is an irresistible romp that explores the undeniably fine lines between friendship and love.”

 

Maximum Harm: The Tsarnaev Brothers, the FBI, and the Road to the Marathon Bombing by Michele R. McPhee

“In Maximum Harm, veteran investigative journalist Michele R. McPhee unravels the complex story behind the public facts of the Boston Marathon bombing. She examines the bombers’ roots in Dagestan and Chechnya, their struggle to assimilate in America, and their growing hatred of the United States—a deepening antagonism that would prompt federal prosecutors to dub Dzhokhar Tsarnaev “America’s worst nightmare.” The difficulties faced by the Tsarnaev family of Cambridge, Massachusetts, are part of the public record. Circumstances less widely known are the FBI’s recruitment of the older brother, Tamerlan Tsarnaev, as a “mosque crawler” to inform on radical separatists here and in Chechnya; the tracking down and killing of radical Islamic separatists during the six months he spent in Russia—travel that raised eyebrows, since he was on several terrorist watchlists; the FBI’s botched deals and broken promises with regard to his immigration; and the disenchantment, rage, and growing radicalization of Tamerlan and Dzhokhar, along with their mother, sisters, and Tamerlan’s wife, Katherine.

Maximum Harm is also a compelling examination of the Tsarnaev brothers’ movements in the days leading up to the Boston Marathon bombing on April 15, 2013, the subsequent investigation, the Tsarnaevs’ murder of MIT police officer Sean Collier, the high-speed chase and shootout that killed Tamerlan, and the manhunt in which the authorities finally captured Dzhokhar, hiding in a Watertown backyard. McPhee untangles the many threads of circumstance, coincidence, collusion, motive, and opportunity that resulted in the deadliest attack on the city of Boston to date.”

 

Conclusion

Thanks so much for joining us today! Thanks to Leah for helping us build our own interpersonal skills! Remember to check out our website for all the information we just discussed. And support our Patreon to be part of our community of leaders!

Tune in next Thursday for another important leadership skill! We are looking forward to chatting with you then.